The New Year is a great time for resolutions, so I thought I would share mine:
10. I will get out of bed before 10:00am. I may get back in, but at least I got out by 10:00.
9. I will be out of my pajamas before lunch. Usually.
8. I'm absolutely, 100%, completely and totally committed to sticking to my lesson plans and schedules. At least for the first week or so.
7. I will stop using the excuse that I'm an environmentalist and that I'm trying to save water when my kids don't get a bath daily.
6. I won't throw french fries to my two year old in the back of the van. My aim is terrible and I'm making a mess of the van.
5. I won't let the laundry pile up so high that my kids think it's a mountain to slide down. Although it does look kinda fun...
4. I will control my urge to physically assault the next person who asks me about socialization. It's an annoying question, but it's not worth 90 days in the slammer. Plus the judge said if I did it one more time... oh, nevermind.
3. I will clean the science experiments out of my refrigerator. By the way, does anybody have any tips on toxic waste disposal?
2. I will not lecture my friends and family on the evils of TV. Even if it is a tool of the devil sent to suck our brains out of our eyeballs.
1. I will get organized! Next year!
A Kid's Heart has some fun Christmas printables. Print mazes, word searches, story starters and coloring pages. Check out the rest of the site, it is a Christain site devoted to children.
One of the perks that comes with staying up until an un-godly hour to watch the midnight showing of the Return of the King is that you can write people and gloat about already having seen it. This, then, is that gloating blog entry.
Having gotten that part out of the way, I would also add that the final chapter of the Lord of the Rings is EXCELLENT. The battle sequences are almost overwhelming. I believe it to be the best of the 3 films. Or 3 parts of one film. Or whatever. Well worth the price of admission, even when the showing gets out at 3:26am as ours did tonight. Or this morning. Or whatever.
So, to recap: 1) gloat gloat gloat; 2) good movie; 3) I'm obviously very tired.
Now go see it already!
--Paul
The other day I was over at my ministry partner Phil's house. We had just eaten lunch, and were about to begin some planning discussions, etc. But first, Phil had to yell at his dog, who was barking in the back yard. His dog is Tiny, and he is tiny. He's a miniature dachshund. Tiny and I have gotten along fine in the past, but this day he was barking and looking rather ticked off.
As Phil tried to get him to shut up, I walked up. "Hey there Tiny! It's just me. Your old friend, Paul." Then, like I've done with hundreds of dogs I've met in my life, I stuck out my right hand to let him smell me.
Tiny bit it.
Ok, so he just nipped my index knuckle, but it still smarted pretty good. Drew some blood, but otherwise no major damage. Phil made the apologies, punished the dog, and then we went about the rest of our meetings.
But the story doesn't end there.
You see, after I came home, I didn't feel so good, so I laid down for a nap. I had strange and troubling dreams. When I awoke, I discovered that somehow I now possessed the proportionate strength and speed of a wiener dog. Which is to say, not that much different from what I had before.
Apparently Tiny was radioactive or genetically modified or a mutant or whatever they do nowadays, and by biting me he passed that on radio-modified-mutation thingamajiggy to me. In addition to my speed and strength, I'm now unable to keep from jumping up on the couch (although my back hurts when I jump back off it). I have a tremendous urge to dig through the garbage. And the yapping. I can't stop yapping.
But don't worry, I've decided to use my powers for good. Just call me your friendly neighborhood Wienerdog-Man.
--Paul
Last night Sheri and I got to go out and enjoy a movie. Just the two of us. We were of course running late to get to the show, so we drove through Taco Cabana to pick up some dinner. So even without the kids, we're still eating in the car. Oh well.
A little ways down the road, Sheri noticed they hadn't given us any napkins. "Don't worry," I said, "I have some Esther napkins over here in the door pocket."
"Don't you mean 'extra' napkins?" she said.
"No, Esther napkins. I put them there for such a time as this."
(see Esther 4:14 if you don't get it...)
--Paul
As you can probably tell from now, I really enjoy finding free printables on the internet. I found some fun Christmas printables at DLTK. You can print out everything from gift tags, iron ons, tracer paper, math worksheets, and more!
Is it really December already? Wasn't it just May or something last week? Where did all that time go?
This year has absolutely flown by in a blur of babies and laughter and crying and school and work that has left me bewildered. December? Already?
I guess it's time to start the two-minute drill that we get into every December. We'll buy gifts, go to parties, sing with friends, buy more gifts, watch plays, visit friends and relatives, tell everyone we're done with Christmas shopping early, and then slip out and buy a few more gifts at the last minute for the few we temporarily forgot.
And I just remembered... I've got to put up the lights on the house. Already?
--Paul
Would you like to have a good laugh? Then go to Grant's Graceland Christmas Celebration and read the "Top Ten Things You Don't Want to Find Under Your Tree" or the "Top Ten Reasons For Last Minute Christmas Shopping."